Signs Of A Controlling Relationship
It is nice to have a secure and caring partner who ensures that all your needs are met. But this attention sometimes goes overboard and makes you feel like a bird in a golden cage.You are likely to be in a controllable relationship if you think your partner is possessive and obsessed with you and you are suffocated by their care or attention.
The relationships under control are not always the same, the level of control varies from couple to couple. However, relationships like these can become toxic and harmful to an individual in time.
What Is A Controlling Relationship?
A controlling relationship is one where the choices are generally made by one partner. Calling the shots, and basically holding the strings to control their partner. The other partner will have no choice in such interactions other than to abide by the regulations set by the controlling partner.
Usually, it starts with a “you don’t take me seriously” or “you’re not permitted to do this, or that.” You start accepting this conduct. Either because you believe it’s normal for someone who loves you to control you, or because you believe they’re doing it all for your own benefit.
And you’ll find yourself locked in a room in no time, the keys in the pocket of your partner.
Here are the top signs you’re in and what you can do about a controlling relationship.
Controlling Partner Signs
Your friends and family may already be wary of the behavior of your partner as people on the outside look in. Yet, subtle manipulations will be used by a possessive partner to keep you under their control. This may make it difficult for you when you are on the receiving end of the abuse to see the signs of a controlling relationship.
Confused when it comes to domestic violence or possessive behavior where your spouse ranks? Here are the most frequently seen signs:
1. Jealousy that is unhealthy:
It is normal for couples to experience in a relationship with mild forms of jealousy. However, unhealthy jealousy can cause your partner to pick up your phone from you or become aggressive when someone flirts with you and stifles your independence.
2. Controlling behavior:
A partner will use behavior control to try to keep you all on their own. They may often blame you on friends and family for spending time with them. They may even attempt to alienate you openly from others who love you.
3. Cyber and physical stalking:
Have you ever felt like being watched? Possessive partners can log in to your social media accounts, snoop on your phone, or even follow you when you’re away from home.
4. Violence and threats:
They resort to physical violence or abusive speech when your spouse doesn’t get what they want or you have a disagreement.
5. Disrespect constantly:
It’s a common tactic for possessive partners to drag down your personal dignity and are often paranoid and disrespectful of your personal space and desires.
If in the initial stages you do not break this controlling behavior, you will lose your ability to think. And become increasingly dependent on your partner. It will be difficult to make even a simple decision like what to cook for dinner without first asking your partner. Slowly, you’re going to lose your self-sufficiency, making you depressed.
7. Play the guilt card:
Controlling partners are master manipulators and will trick you into thinking they are controlling you for your own good, and demonstrating any opposition is utter disrespect. They’ll get into your head and make you think that things between the two of you are quite normal. They even offer you statistics or examples that most partners act like them. They will make you feel guilty about fighting with them and not being able to gain their love.
You might have fallen in love with your partner, and you might think without them you can’t live. But if they use your love to manipulate you as a weakness, then it’s time to take a step back and assess it.
Dealing With A Controlling Partner
You can attempt to discuss your issues with your partner before you put an end to a controlling relationship and let them know that their conduct hurts you. Here are a few ways to do that and resist in a relationship being regulated.
- Never give up on yourself, always make self-care a priority; it is only to break your trust and gain control over you that every degrading phrase was spoken by your controlling partner.
- Stop a person who can’t even pass a puddle for you crossing the hills. Do not beg or do things to please them if your partner makes his love conditional.
- Stop pretending that it’s all right. If it were, you wouldn’t read or question your connection with this article.
- Think about what’s healthy for you and do more of that. Pursue it, whether it’s something in your job or a hobby. You’ll become more comfortable and feel good about yourself when you’re good at something. This will assist you to get out of the vicious circle of seeking the validation of your partner.
Stop apologizing for the abusive conduct of your partner. They don’t have the right to shout or hit you just because you haven’t done what they want.
Is the only option to walk out of the partnership? Not always, not always. You can set certain ground rules and start a new life together with some support if your partner knows that you are trapped and prepared to alter for you.But that may not be the case at all.
Tolerating a controlling relationship with your partner will only cause more pain and may pose a serious risk to your safety. If you’re not happy and can’t feel alive in a relationship, it’s time to end that relationship.